He's baa-a-a-a-ck!

Ron got to come home this afternoon. He has the constitution of a bull or something. He gets sick very quickly, but once he starts getting better he bounces right back. Tonight, you wouldn't think there had been anything out of the ordinary wrong with him.

He has a mild case of cirrhosis (from his mega list of medications) and the combination of the increased aluminum (from the kidney disease) and the ammonia (from the liver problems) made him pretty sick. Once they got those numbers down, he's much better.

Thanks for all the prayers and well-wishes! We're going to spend a quiet evening in front of the television and the computer. Ron's watching the TV and I'm on the computer - I'll join him in a bit. I treated us to dinner from Spangles (a KS-based hamburger joint; good junk!). I'm getting ready to put on my winter jammies and get a blanket. I'd turn on our gas fireplace but I don't know how to light the pilot (grin). I turned it off in the summer so I didn't burn excess gas with keeping the pilot light on - and I didn't have to work so hard to cool the living room because of the warmth of the fireplace. Tonight, I am wishing that I was a bit more mechanically inclined and knew how to light the darn thing. Oh well - it will pass and tomorrow I may not care.

Happy New Year to you all!

Lost a follower :(

I was all excited to see that I had 35 followers. Guess someone didn't find me entertaining, after all. Today I have 34. {sigh} Oh well, can't please all of the people all of the time.

My sincere wish is for all of you to have a very joyous and safe New Year! Peace and blessings to you from Ron and I!

Teresa

ANichols.Too

Anyone else having trouble reading her blog? All of a sudden when I try to click on her link, I'm getting the message that her blog is open only to invited readers.

It appears to not recognize my email address.

Thanks.

3 hours of sleep and I'm good to go

Of course, I did have to throw in some very strong coffee and a hot shower. I talked to Ron a bit ago and he sounds good. Said his ammonia level is dropping (yay for the lactulose). He was mistaken when he thought it was aluminum in the blood... it was the ammonia. That makes perfect sense since he has liver disease.

Speaking of disease, I need to update my list. The hospital had more on their list than I do so I need to find out what I'm missing. I'd say the count was at least 20 things, not 14 or 15 like I previously thought.

Thanks for all the prayers, good thoughts, and well wishes. You just can't even begin to know how much I appreciate all of you and how you keep me uplifted. God's blessing to all of you in the coming year! You all deserve to be blessed greatly.

I'll be back on here later today with (hopefully) an update.

t.

"Dog" and Beth Chapman

Ron and I watched "The Mercy Tour" last night while we were waiting for him to be moved to a room. It was very good. A lot of people give them bad press but they also do a lot of good for other people. I don't like their foul language when they are apprehending someone (especially with their prayers before and after), but when I'm in the thick of things my language isn't always what I'm proud of, either.

I would like to see Beth dress a bit less flashy but I think she would be a blast to go shopping with. LOL - maybe we could go together and she could get rid of some of my total "blah" when it comes to picking out clothes and I could help her pick tops that don't show quite as much of the girls. Hahahaha! I don't know how she walks in those shoes either but kudos to her for being able to.

Duane just cracks me up. I didn't realize he was as short as he is (even in his boots). I really think he must be a very nice man even though his choice of attire isn't something I much for. But, he does draw attention and if that's what he's shooting for - he's succeeding!

We DVR the episodes and watch them when we can't find anything else on TV that Ron wants to watch. We watch them while we're DVRing them, too. Ron doesn't remember most of the time that he's just seen the episode and it doesn't bother me to re-watch them.

Too bad they're not coming to our neck of the woods. I'd go get an autographed book for Ron. Not like he could read it, but he'd have it. Wouldn't that be fun?

He's been admitted

It's 4:30 AM and we are in a room. Private... Compliments of possible Hep C. Thank you blood-borne disorders for providing us with a private room!

The ER doctor mentioned a condition called Hepatic Encephalopathy since his ammonia levels are so elevated (and higher today than they were yesterday). I can see where some of the symptoms are definitely things that could be things that Ron is exhibiting. Other things... not so sure. I wonder how his apparently healthy liver (as recently as February 2010) could become this diseased so quickly. They took a bucket of blood in the ER and his nurse just said they'll be in about 5:30 AM to draw more blood.

One of the treatment options for HE is a lactulose (cellulose laxative), which would (or could) increase the possibility of diarrhea. Not a good thing for a peg-legger to have. The signs and symptoms section of this Wiki article I found sounds remarkably like Ron..."The mildest form of hepatic encephalopathy is difficult to detect clinically, but may be demonstrated on neuropsychological testing. It is experienced as forgetfulness, mild confusion and irritability. More severe encephalopathy is characterised by an inverted sleep-wake pattern (sleeping by day, being awake at night), marked irritability, tremor, difficulties with coordination and trouble writing." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hepatic_encephalopathy) Ron definitely has some (most) of the mild symptoms and also the more severe. His wake/sleep pattern has been inverted for quite some time. The coordination, tremor, and writing difficulties could also be Parkinsons. Tough call.

I will be off work again today (lovely - 2nd day this week without pay) but since it's only 3 hours until I'm supposed to BE at work, I don't think I can make it.

Surprisingly, I am very calm. I don't know why exactly but I am.

Well... a hospital trip was not in my plans tonight

Ron fell twice tonight. Second time I called for an ambulance. Posting from my phone. They will probably keep him overnight for observation.

That could be a blessing in disguise. Will be making some calls tomorrow.

FML

I kept seeing those letters on the status of several of my Facebook contacts. I finally asked my sister what it meant and it very plainly means "F" my life. Hmmmm.... didn't think I'd really need it but I found myself using my own variation of the theme tonight. S-M-L... SCREW my life.  hehehehe!

Back to the issue I hinted about in my earlier post. I may wander around getting there, but I will.

Ron went to see the hematologist on Monday and had blood drawn for his kidney doctor. Yesterday, he had additional blood drawn for the hematologist. Today, the nurse from his kidney doctor called and said that the aluminum level (in his blood) was over 70 (he told me two different numbers so not sure which one is correct - I will be calling them tomorrow) and the normal is less than 5.41. In order to be considered "toxic" it would have to be over 100, but I'm thinking in the 70s is pretty darn close. They will retest his blood in a month to see if it's still up above normal, and how high above normal.

Aluminum toxicity can cause a number of things, such as mental confusion, weakness, gastro-intestinal disturbances, etc. I have named these three because these seem to be what's increasing in Ron... He is much more confused (and denies the confusion), he's very weak, and he's had some serious gastro-intestinal issues lately. I bought disposable undergarments tonight.

He came over to me and held his right arm up in the air with a fist, and his left arm down about 18 inches with his palm open. He asked if this (the fist) was the end of my rope and that (the open palm) where I was. I said that was pretty close. He wanted to know if I'd given up on him. I haven't, but I said that I had nothing left to give - it wasn't a matter of giving up; there was nothing left.

There have been a lot of tears shed today - by him and by me. We both know that it's time for him to move on to someplace where he can get the care he needs. Today he ate the protein shake I made him this morning, 4 pieces of cheese, and 8 pieces of candy. When I talked to him (again) about eating FOOD he said that he wasn't hungry. This I know - he doesn't get hungry. I told him he had to eat at scheduled times and that we've discussed it before. He has no recollection of our previous discussions.

I don't really think he has aluminum toxicity since he's had these symptoms for quite a while. His aluminum levels last time they were tested were within normal limits or we would have heard about it before now. So, just not sure what is up with this.

I do know that I need to figure out what kind of attorney I need to contact to see about getting this ball rolling. Keith and I discussed moving him as quickly as possible and then me doing what needs to be done to get rid of the house. Paying for this out of our pocket means only one thing for us... Bankruptcy and foreclosure. Not pretty words, but I'm to the point where I realize they are going to happen. I will lose my car as well. Taking his income plus part of mine and putting it in assisted living means that I'll have less than $1300 per month for my entire living expenses. This amount will not include a vehicle payment.

So, I think the FML is really more accurate than SML is.

Don't you?

Schowalter Villa

Schowalter Villa Retirement Community is a not-for-profit, Christian-based community that has been owned and operated since 1961 by the Mennonite Board of Missions & Charities of Kansas, Inc. It is a Continuing Care Retirement Community that provides a full range of care from Independent Living to Assisted Living, Memory Care, and Complete Nursing Care. They also have income-based rent in one of the sections (Independent Living) that is subsidized by HUD.

The locations are:

Arbor Vista (the oldest buildings) and are “cottages” (duplexes) are near the assisted living and health care center. They have various sizes but the bathroom access is “difficult” at best.

Hickory Homes is the HUD subsidized one bedroom duplexes and one bedroom apartments. The bathroom access is better but the rooms are quite small.

Lakeside Village is the “high rise” in the neighborhood and offer 1 and 2 bedroom apartments that either overlooks the lake (for a higher price) or the parking lot. They are close to the Water’s Edge restaurant the wellness center.

Lake Vista is the newest addition and are duplexes and fourplexes with up to three bedrooms and 2-car garages. They have a variety of floor plans and special features.

I am not interested in Lakeside Village at all. Ron would not be able to let Maisey out to potty and he can’t take her for a walk. Plus, I’m just not “into” living in an apartment building.

Hickory Homes could be an option, but they are only 1 bedroom, no carport (which would be difficult to load and unload Ron in bad weather), and the rooms are very small. Our bed would fill the bedroom and block the closet. But, Ron could access the bathroom easier. Not so with the kitchen (small, galley-style). Plus, no W/D hookups at all. Would have to use the on-site laundry facilities for $2-3 per load.

Arbor Vista has the least expensive option available (I’ll share fees and prices later). They were built first so they are NOT ADA compliant. They also are not designed in any way to make them ADA compliant. They do have some nice features (beamed, vaulted ceiling, carport, patio, some storage, appliances, etc.)

Lake Vista is the best, but it’s also the most expensive. The rooms are bigger and they were built to be ADA compliant and totally wheelchair accessible. They vary in size from 1112 sq ft to 1600 sq ft. They also include many amenities such as all appliances, 2 or 3 car garages (not carport), plenty of storage, patio, ceiling fans, and they are very well laid-out.

Fees and Prices:

Arbor Vista: These are the only ones that offer a month-to-month option without an entrance fee or 12-months advance rental payment. But, this is only available on the one bedroom duplex. The 1br rents for $550 per month and does not have a maintenance fee. It’s strictly month-to-month. The problem is the size; it is about 700 square feet and we’d have to sell or store most of our stuff. The kitchen is pretty accessible and getting into the bedroom would be OK. The bathroom would be tricky (at best) and the tub nearly impossible. I could possibly get him in the door with the transfer wheelchair (forgot to check that out) but I don’t think he could do it by himself.

The 2br rents for $750 plus $439 maintenance fee. It would require a $3450 upfront payment (due at contract signing), but if and when we transferred to the “permanent” duplex, we would not have to re-pay it. It has 960 square feet. They usually require the 12 months of rent in advance but she said they may be able to waive that requirement since we’re shooting for moving to the other place. If you pay 12 months in advance, then you’d only pay the maintenance fee each month for the first 12 months and then go month-to-month after that (rent + maintenance fee).

Each section has four options for living there. Option A gives you a fixed 75% refund on your “up front” money when you move, Option B gives you 85% refund, less 5% annually (down to 50%), Option C gives you 90% refund, less 10% annually (with no downward limit), and Option D is strictly rent. Each option also involves a monthly “HOA” fee (they call service fee) and this is $439 per month. All but Option D also has an entrance fee of $3450 (2-3 bedrooms) or $2450 (1 bedroom). The up-front amount varies from a low of $35,950 (1-br duplex – Option D) to $97,950 (2-BR, 2BA – Option A).

Ron did think he could get into the bathroom with his leg and walker. Honestly, I’m not sure. I’m thinking we may need to get a bedside commode for him and I’ll just have to get over myself and take care of it. He’s having incontinence problems so it may be a moot point anyway if he needs to go into Depends. He can (hopefully) change them during the day if he has a problem. Not sure about that, either. If he has trouble standing long enough to remove soiled clothing, I don’t see him being able to stand long enough to remove a soiled undergarment.

Lake Vista: These are my favorite (of course) and the most accessible as far as Ron is concerned. They are beautiful, have fully equipped kitchens, and laundry area in the hallway (behind closet doors). The kitchen is accessible for Ron and the rooms are big enough for him to get around in. Major drawback… Have to pay 12 months’ rent in advance, plus the $3450 entrance fee. (If we paid that fee for Arbor Vista we would not have to re-pay it if we moved to Lake Vista.) They range in size from 1112 square feet in a 2-BR, 2BA fourplex to 1600 square feet in a 3BR duplex. Their options are the same as far as refund percentages. The amount of money needed to move in there would be $19,000 ($1350 * 12 + $3450). Last time I checked, I didn’t have that much money laying around here so that isn’t really a possibility (unless someone wins the lottery or Mega Millions and buys me into the place – or someone like Oprah or Ellen – hahaha – jumps in and takes care of it). The duplex is more accessible than the rooms in the fourplex (according to the marketing director). The up-front money for these go from a “low” of $107,950 (2 BR fourplex) to a high of $179,950 ( 3 BR duplex, sunroom, 2-car garage). As much as it would be nice to have a 3-BR with 2-car garage (which would be about the same square footage as what we have now), it’s not necessary. I’d just like the extra space for visitors and such. Plus, I don’t have the money to move in there anyway – in any way, shape, or form.

If I had to move him to assisted living, they have various room sizes and the cost is from $88 per day to $109 per day. They have a single room, a larger room, 2 rooms, and a 2 room suite. On top of that, add nursing care from $25 per day (level 1) to $53 per day (level 5). At the cheapest level, that is over $3,000 per month ($3390 on a 30-day month; less for February and more for 31-day months) that we would have to pay for. At that point, I would not be able to afford to live anywhere except a one-bedroom (if I was lucky and still had a job). (After today – which will be another post – that possibility is more of a probability, and soon…)

I was looking at getting him a hospital bed that would raise up and down but they are pricey and I’m not sure what I’d do with our King-size bed (I would then sleep on the sofa or an air mattress).

I honestly don’t know what to do. If I even think about it I start crying and can’t very well sit here bawling all day. Doesn’t look good for me.
Someone – please figure my life out for me and tell me what to do…..

Thisisme...

I wasn't sure how I'd get my 3rd consecutive post in that referenced my friend on the other side of the pond, so I decded I'd dedicate an ENTIRE post to her.

Thisisme

Thisisme

Thisisme

Except, I'm not sure what to write, except she's got some darling grandchildren. She lives someplace I'd really like to visit. Her daughter lives somewhere else I'd like to visit (France). Her blog is always interesting and I'm very glad that I found her.

(how's that???)