Money Money Money

I am totally amazed at the cost of things these days. We need a ramp. NOW rather than later. I talked to some men from my church who do this sort of thing and I wasn't thinking anything fancy - just a ramp to get DH in the house when we come home from the hospital.

$1500 was my quote. I just about croaked but I didn't. I just can't worry about one more thing as there's no room in my noggin to float any more stuff around. Finally got the carpenter to say if he borrowed a framing tool, he could do it just straight out from the door, and not really the right slope, for $600. That would not be with handrails, but that's OK. And, I don't want it attached permanent to my garage floor. I'd like to use my garage to park in once we get stuff moved around and situated.

Even at this point, $600 is not a do-able amount. So, DD is paying for it. My DS gave me money to cover the two pieces of medical equipment I purchased last week. I need to figure out a way to get DH a new bed, one that he can get in and out of easier. We currently have a king size tempur-pedic type of bed and it just collapses under him. We really need a queen sized adjustable bed, more of a "craftmatic" type of system so there's more room for the scooter to maneuver. I'm praying for that to be provided to us because it's not in my power to buy it. I'm also praying that insurance approves the trapeze and floor stand.

DH was supposed to work two more years after we moved into our house. Instead, he worked two months. Now I need to figure out how to pay for it. If it was just us I'd say we'll do our best and if that's not good enough, we've started over before and can do it again.

But, DD borrowed $10,000 and spent another $500 out of her pocket to make the living area in the basement for her and my grandson. I can't let them down and it would be really hard on him to have to move again. Being PDD-NOS he doesn't adjust to change very well. I had planned on putting together enough money to finish the family room area for them and have a separate little kitchen so when my grandson got up in the morning he'd have a place to have his breakfast. Plus, I wanted it to feel like she had her own place in the basement and not just living in our basement. I would feel so bad if we lost her money in all of this too. The kitchen is about $3500. We also don't have a yard. That's another $1200 and we have to figure out a way to put it in before the Kansas rains start or the lake behind me will be reclaiming my yard. That's not good... And we also need to finish fencing our back yard so my grandson doesn't fall in the lake. Being developmentally delayed, he doesn't understand some dangers. We have "beeps" on all the doors, a gate at the top of the deck, and one at the bottom of the stairs. But, kids have been known to figure out other ways around safety nets and we want to make sure the yard is fenced to keep him safe. We also need some pavers put under our deck so he has a safe place to play with his toys. All of this costs money, money, money...

I said before that I sometimes dreamed that people showed up and took care of things for me. I still do to a certain extent. It would be nice to have someone ring my doorbell and say "I'm here to..." and when I said I didn't have money to do that be told it was all taken care of. I've taken care of everyone else for so long that it would be really nice to have someone take care of me for a change and me not have to worry about it. That would be a switch for sure.

My kids do what they can but none of us are trained in doing carpentry work. I don't like doing "man" work. I just don't have what it takes to do that stuff and it frustrates me. DD stained all the woodwork in the basement and we both painted (although we're not finished yet). DS is great at hauling this and hauling that and he's taking care of some computer issues (my desktop decided today that it needed to overheat; now isn't that lovely?) But, he doesn't make a lot of money and he's totally paying his own living expenses now so I'd rather he make sure that he stays afloat before he helps us out.

I have a real peace about the outcome of DH's medical procedures and I am not going to worry about the financial aspect of it. On Sunday a lady came up to me at church and said she had a word for me from God. She said she'd been praying for us on Friday night and God told her to tell us that He was in control and He had a reason for these things happening right now. We didn't need to know or do anything more than trust in Him and let Him have it. That's what I'm doing. If God so chooses, He can lay it on someone's heart (or more than one someone) to provide all the things that we still need here.