I tried to create a new banner picture for my Facebook page of all my grandbabies in birth order. I don't have any early pictures of Isaiah on my computer so his was of his first birthday. Unfortunately, FB didn't upload the photo the way I wanted to so I'm back to the drawing board on it. They are (in birth order) Isaiah (Amy's), Alexander (Shaun's), Kaitlyn (Shaun's), Zachary (Shaun's), Anna (Amy's), and Tristan (Shaun's newest). It's amazing how much alike Shaun's boys look. Except for Isaiah, these are all their "coming home" photos. I had one of Kaitlyn in her car seat, too but the toys hanging down pretty much blocked her face. She is such a beautiful child with long dark hair. All of the kids are beautiful (I'm not just prejudiced, either - lol - much). It's hard to tell in the picture but Tristan was the heaviest of all the kids at 8 lbs 6.5 oz and 21 inches. Isaiah was a little over 7 pounds and 20.5 inches. I don't remember Anna's weight (I think she was close to 7 pounds) but she was only 19 inches long. Shaun's other babies were all right at 6 lbs and a few ounces - and 19 inches long.
On this Mother's Day I feel incredibly blessed to be "grandma" to these babies and to be grandma to our grown up grandkids (Tim's three - Shelby, Hayden, Zane - and Stacey's two - Mariah and Faith). Even though we don't see Tim's kids very often we love them and think about them often. In fact, Shelby's graduating from high school this next week and I'm planning on attending her graduation Saturday (if Ron feels up to it). Faith is also graduating this coming Saturday and we've been invited to her celebration as well. Thankfully they are two different times during the day so we can hit both (if he's up to it).
We visited Schowalter's "adult day care" and assisted living center on Friday. The day care is not as expensive as I thought it would be ($58 per day) and he wouldn't have to go every day. We thought we'd try 2-3 days per week and see how it is. He could have breakfast and lunch there. They have to come over and do an assessment to make sure they can offer him the care and services he needs (had to laugh at this since "I" am the one currently offering the care and services he needs - without training or assistance) and then we could go from there. I got a 14 page booklet to apply for Medicaid for him to see if we can actually get some assistance with a program called Home and Community Based Assistance. It's where they try to help seniors (or disabled individuals) stay in their homes longer. It's cheaper than assisted living and could possibly give us a little bit of assistance. The lion's share of the expenses would be on us but could possibly help with resources.
The advantage of Ron going to day care some during the week would put him higher on the waiting list if he needed to go to assisted living. That fee is about $3500 per month and without Medicaid we could not afford that. SRS (Social and Rehabilitation Services) will take that application I'll fill out and divide our assets (haha - as such as they are) and decide what percentage of Ron's disability income and retirement pay will go toward his care and what percentage of my salary will go toward it) and then Medicaid will help with the rest.
Ron's not against getting the ball rolling but he says he's not ready to move to assisted living yet. I told him that I agreed that most days I didn't feel like he needed that much assistance. Other days, I was sure that he needed more than I could provide. Case in point - last Monday I had to take him to the ER. He fell again over the weekend that I was in KC and he was just sick. They did a CT scan and x-rays of his shoulder, knee, and arm. I'm sure we got our extremely high deductible covered (now just have to figure out how to pay for it)! If he had been at day care or respite care while I was gone, I'm not sure he would have been in a position to have fallen. Maybe - but maybe not.
The social worker said it was best that we start now instead of when we need it. It is not a fast process so even if he gets approved for assistance, I'll be paying the $$ for the care up front for however long it takes to get approved.
Today we are going to brunch (LOL - in the afternoon) with Amy and Rex and Keith. It will be a nice day. I know Ron has a card for me because he had Amy get one at the store yesterday (I tried to not notice when she brought it in and gave it to him). He said he owes her $20 so there's something else that she got, too. Probably some candy that I'll love but that I don't need (doesn't mean I won't eat it!). I probably have cards in the mailbox waiting for me (haven't been to the mailbox for a few days). I will go pick up my mail sometime today just so the box doesn't get too full (it's down the street but not on the way home so I forget to go get the mail).
Well, I think this book is probably long enough and I better close out. Speaking of books, I have a lot of author friends and I just re-connected with another. Ron's bestest friend in the whole world passed away in 1999 and after that time we lost touch with his ex-wife (we'd been friends for years but after their divorce she moved to St. Louis). I had heard she was back in Wichita so I did a search on FB for her and sure enough, there she was. I started clicking some links and discovered she's just published a book - Valley of Sorrows (her name is Nathalie Goldston if you want to search for it) - and the download is free this week. I downloaded it and plan on reading it this week. I can't wait to read it as the reviews are very positive. I am also planning on ordering another book from another blogging friend, Green Girl in Wisconsin. Unfortunately, I can't get hers electronically yet but a hard copy (autographed I hope!) will be great.
Happy Mother's Day to all of you who are mothers or just mother another! May your day be blessed!
ihs
Teresa
7 comments:
Hi Teresa. Like you, I just can't believe that nearly half of this year has passed by already, and the little ones are growing away so quickly. You are blessed indeed with all your grandchildren my friend. I agree, really, that it is best to get the ball rolling with Ron and any future assisted living, rather than suddenly been thrown into it all when he really needs it. It would certainly help if he could go to the Daycare Centre a couple of times a week, AND he would have some company during that time as well. It's all a bit of a worry though, isn't it? I continue to pray that something will work out for you both. Take care. Sending hugs your way, and thank you for your concern over how I've been feeling lately. I do appreciate that.
Happy Mother's Day Teresa! Great to be a Grandma isn't it? My favorite job. Adult Day Care sounds pretty good at this stage. I'm sure you were beside yourself when Ron fell again. I used to think it was going to stop but it didn't. As we have learned about government assistance ... start the process now. They don't care about you and your needs. It's all about the paperwork and the shuffle. Good luck with that. Hope your Mother's Day was a great one! Hugs.
Dearest Teresa,
Oh, Baby Anna looks really happy in the bouncer. How cute and learn first to have fun, doesn't she♡♡♡ Yes, you are so happily blessed grandma, they all are lovely♪
I could see that you're having nice plan about Daycare Center. I DO hope things will work out well☆☆☆
My late bro had taken care of these thing step by step for out father seeing his condition. I really appreciate that for him. Yes, the paper work and the cost. Thanks to my fathers pension (which is rather high considering we are having low rate), we can manage to pay for his old people's house.
Good Luck, my friend!
Love you always, xoxo Miyako*
Time flys doesn't it 6 months old already, I agree with Diane it would be a good idea to see if you can get Ron to go the centre a couple of times a week it would be great for him and may help improve and sad moods he has. My nan use to go to a day care place 3 days a week before she went into the nursing home they would pick her up in the morning and drop her home in the afternoon and it would give my pop a break......hope you had a great Mother's Day........
I am glad that you are sounding more positive and things are in the pipeline to get you guys more help. I know from experience it is best to think ahead but it is a very hard thing to do, when your head tells you one thing and your heart tells you another.
You sound a lot more positive, probably cos you shared your problem with your bloggy friends who are here to help. Sometimes too, you just have to tell it like it is eh?
Thinking of you :)
Aw, you are sweet to shout-out to me! Send me your mailing address again via email and I'll get you a book, Teresa.
I enjoy reading how proud you are of your grandbabies. And the adult day care sounds like such a great idea--something to ease your life AND Ron's!
Happy belated Mother's Day!! I am glad to hear you and Ron are still doing well besides his fall. I will be back around the bloggy world for a while, I hated being away and wondering how you and Ron were doing. I did check in every once in a while and read a post or two of yours. I hope all works out with the Daycare Center. Have a great week :)
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