Thursday, August 30, 2012

Catching Up

Again... That seems to be my theme song these days.

I am very remiss about writing these days. I’ve started many different posts and never got past the first few paragraphs. Some of them are so out-of-date that it is just not feasible to post them. I’ll try again this weekend to get some stuff up. I miss reading and writing but I’ve just got so much going on that I can’t keep up with it all. I suppose if I made a goal of once per week that would be sufficient. I need to update Isaiah’s blog, too. He’s growing like a weed and in 3rd grade this year. Wow! It’s just amazing to see how much he has changed and grown over the past few years, and especially since Rex has come into the picture.

Rex is a wonderful dad to Isaiah and we couldn’t ask for anyone better. Isaiah wants to go to the same college Rex attended (K-State in Manhattan, KS) and have the same type of career (agricultural engineering). It’s just a joy to see them together. Isaiah is an awesome big brother to Anna, too. He has his moments but most of the time he’s great at entertaining her while his parents are busy. She’s taking a few steps now and seems to be into everything. He definitely has to be on his toes when he’s playing with her. She’s quite the little princess.

Ron is doing OK. His last checkup from the kidney doctor was really good. His neurologist gave him an additional pill for Parkinson’s and it seems to be helping. He’s now on three different Parkinson medications (one is a combo pill, so technically four different medications). He’s lost quite a bit of weight and is getting around the house better. He’s fallen a few times (broke a rib and one of our chairs) but for the most part is doing very well.

I had an MRI Arthrogram yesterday (not the best way to spend your birthday but at least they sedated me for it). They injected a contrast material into my left shoulder and then did the MRI (sedated – yay! Thank God for good drugs!). It doesn’t appear that I’ve re-torn my rotator cuff – which is a good thing. However, I found out I have a SLAP lesion (that’s a tear in the Labrum) in my left shoulder. Baseball pitchers get this type of injury but I don’t play ball. The only thing I can think of is that because it’s already a weaker joint than my other arm, that I injured it trying to catch Ron or pick him back up. This is why I’ve had so much pain and so many problems with it. I’ve done the injection, rest, heat/ice, exercise, anti-inflammatory meds, etc. so I wonder if the next step will be arthroscopic surgery. My orthopedic doctor is retiring and the practice is getting a new doctor. So, I don’ t know if he’ll want to start over or just go right for the surgery. I might try to put it off (regardless of the suggestions) until after the first of the year. I think I’d be off work for up to four weeks. Not sure… From what I’ve read, the patient wears an immobilizer sling for 2-4 weeks. Not sure how I’d dress for work with something like that. Oh well – will see what the new doctor says and I won’t see him for at least three more weeks.

I probably won't get caught up on all my blog reading so you'll all just have to bear with me. Or, not. LOL! I try - really I do. But there are just days that I come home and want to do nothing. N.O.T.H.I.N.G. And, that's exactly what I do. I get dinner, do whatever needs to be done around the house, take care of what Ron needs done, and then sit down. Sometimes I read and sometimes I surf Facebook, which is a real time waster. I have to watch myself there.

I'm not really having any issues but just have a lot on my mind.

A friend of mine described a sort of "circle dance" on her blog recently. She is an amazing friend - one I've never met in person - and I often find that what she writes speaks to my soul. She is able to put to words things that I know my heart and soul feels deeply - things that I would say if I could find the words to do so.

I have found myself performing my own version of this circle dance. Do I write, or do I not? Do I care what others think and say, or do I not? I've always wanted to be the "people pleaser" and hate it when someone is mad at me or disappointed in me. I hate it when people decide to drop out of my life without saying what I did to offend them. I can't attempt to "fix" what I don't know is "broken." I think it's even worse to find out that I really did nothing. It would be easier to understand if "I" was responsible for something that I could fix. I have given up trying, though.

When I started blogging, I did so pretty much as a sanity check because it was such a stressful time in my life. I did it for me and then I discovered reading blogs written by others and others started reading my blog. I've made so many friends through this online world. Seriously, how would I have ever gotten to Australia, New Zealand, England, or Japan except through this blog? It's pretty impressive (to me) that the words I've written have spanned the globe and ended up displayed on someone else's computer screen. This is no small thing to me. Unlike gaming, where people live in make-believe worlds with make-believe items, this is real life and involves real people.

I’ve had my share of ups and my share of downs. We all have. None of us is any more special than the next person. Our challenges are just that – “our” challenges. They’re no less challenging or any more challenging than the next person’s. Everything we do and say is subjective. The level of joy, sorrow, ease, or difficulty that each of us experiences is different for each person. I think all we can do is support each other in those challenges – no matter what they might be.

I’ve been much busier since I changed jobs and my writing has suffered. I’ve also tried to not focus so much on “airing” our medical problems. There are those who just don’t want to hear about them. That’s OK. This blog isn’t about them or for them. As such, they may have left and/or decided to not read any longer. Again, that is OK. But, if what I've said has offended anyone then for that, I truly am sorry. Offense has never been my intent and never will be.

This is probably as long of a rambling post as I should do. If you've made it this far - good for you. LOL - if you bailed before you got to the end, that's OK too.

I'll catch up with ya'll later. I still have a book giveaway and an Oak Ridge Boys giveaway (I haven't forgotten!).