Finding Teresa

July 19, 2016
I haven't been back to the gym, but I have been busy. I'm eating better and working around the house. We still have a bunch of boxes to go through, so trying to get them emptied and things put away. It's been a challenge! My Murphy bed frame (and cabinetry) would not fit down the stairs to the basement, so my storage for my crafting business is SORELY lacking. I am not sure what I'm going to do with the stuff I have. I hate to think about buying something else but just really torn with how to store and use my stuff. And the lighting is TERRIBLE down there. Plus, no electrical outlets to plug lamps into. It's a mess. Literally and figuratively. I spent this past weekend in Branson with my friend (of 50 years!) and we had a lot of fun. We did NOT diet. We had fun.

Since I go back to work on Monday, I won't get back to the gym for water aerobics. That's too bad because I did enjoy it. I will have to figure something out.

July 6, 2016
Well, I took a couple of days off because of the holiday, and then I woke up with sciatica so had to take a couple more days off. Tomorrow, I should be back on schedule! I enjoyed the long weekend, albeit maybe a bit too much. :) Yesterday for dinner, I fixed grilled chicken, corn on the cob, garlic bread (it was very good), and an apple crumble. I had some apples that really needed something done with them, so I decided a pie was in order. I didn't have a HUGE serving, but probably more than I needed. It was seriously delicious. It called for 2 sticks of butter, but I only used one. I also used a bit less brown sugar than it called for. I'm not sure how much, because it called for 2.5 cups PACKED brown sugar and I didn't pack it. It was plenty sweet.

I've been working around the house, getting more things unpacked and put away, so I have been getting some exercise. Just not the exercise that I "should" be getting. I've also gotten lazy about my water intake. Not terrible, but not nearly where it should be. I go back to work on July 25, so that will make it better. I take water to work (I don't like the water out of the tap there) and usually have no trouble getting my intake.

June 30, 2016
Day four - definitely a struggle to get out the door. I didn't make it to water aerobics, but I did walk 25 minutes on the treadmill (average pace 2.8 mph) and I did 20 minutes on the different machines. I was glad that I'd gone. The scales didn't move today. That's OK. If they move a little 2-3 times a week - DOWN - that's plenty. Tonight for supper we're having chicken lettuce wraps and beef wraps.

June 29, 2016
Day three... Day one was so much easier; day two a bit of a struggle. Day three - I did not want to get out. But, I had to take Isaiah to class anyway, so I decided I'd go ahead and take the plunge. Literally. I made it to water aerobics. That was the only thing I actually had time for today since I had to take him to class and pick him back up. Tomorrow, I can go earlier to use the machines and follow with water aerobics before I pick him up.

The scales weren't as nice to me today as they were yesterday. That's OK. I wasn't as nice with my food plan as I had been. Supper last night was cereal. And other "carby" snack later. Not a good thing for me. Breakfast today was overnight oats. Definitely healthy, but not light on carbs, either. After two cups of coffee and my oats, THEN I weighed myself. I know that's not how it's supposed to happen. Tomorrow, I'll get on the scales after I get up and before I start my day. (Of course, I had THREE tacos for supper tonight! They were so delicious!!!)

Tomorrow is another day and I intend to make it count!

June 28, 2016
Many times over the past two years, I've struggled to regain my footing and determine my identity. I have been more successful on some attempts than others. I lost weight, gained a bit back, lost some more, and (finally) gained some back. I'm currently at a weight that is lower than I've been in about 20 years, but not where I was nine months ago (the "some back" previously noted). I decided it was time that I really took stock of where I stand with myself and what I intend to do about it.

It was a great blessing to be able to move to the "farm-ette" with Amy and her family. I have my own space (about 1500 sq ft of it) and I get to see three of my grandchildren every day. It's a win-win situation for us all. My expenses are no more than before (and some months will be considerably less since they're covering the heat, electricity, cable, and internet) and we eat supper together many nights. I'm really working on being the best "me" that I can possibly be. But... I still need to figure out who "me" really is.

In January, I started working as a school secretary. It's a nice job - not too stressful and not overly busy (except for the beginning of the day). I love interacting with the students and the staff is great - very easy to get along with. I didn't necessarily want to have to go back to work, but my oldest son is going through some tough times and I felt like I needed to help him out. So... back to work I went. I'd like to be able to completely retire by this time next year. We shall see...

After my shoulder surgery rehab, I was given 10 visits to the local wellness center. That was right after Ron had died and I just didn't feel like taking the time to go. Luckily, the pass doesn't have an expiration on it so I decided that I'd start using it. Yesterday, I did some recumbent biking, walked on the treadmill, used a few of the machines, and then did some water aerobics. I felt like mush when I walked out of there, but I was stoked that I'd done it. Today, I needed to take Isaiah to a class he's taking this week, so I only had about 45 minutes. I walked on the treadmill 20 minutes and then spent the rest of the time using machines. Tomorrow, I'll have about the same amount of time so I'm going to do the water aerobics. If I manage to go 10 straight visits (M-F), then I will sign up for one month. If I'm successful in going MOST of the month, then I'll sign up for the next month. I'd really like to sign up for 3-months because I want to spend $75 extra to get a customized 12-week program. But, I'm not going to rush into it until I know I can depend on myself to put myself ahead of the pack. That will be something that's pretty new.

I got on the scales this morning (I've been avoiding them) and discovered that I've lost a few of the "some back" pounds that I gained over the winter. Yay, me! I still have a few more and then I'll begin working on the rest of the weight that needs to come off. I don't see my physician until early August, so my goal is to have a lower weight and better health numbers (A1C, cholesterol, triglycerides, BP, etc.) when I go back.

So, where does this leave me? I won't probably get on here and write something every day, but I plan to use this space to reflect on different things and what triggers me to turn to food. I need something other than food when I feel stress or anxiety. Writing has been a good outlet in the past so maybe it will again.

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