Saturday, October 3, 2009

Health updates

Let's see... where to start.

Ron's kidneys are doing better. His colon is not. It's having difficultly letting him do his "bizniss" on any given day. Gastroparesis is an ugly thing to live with. He takes more than one medication to help provide him with relief but nothing really works very well. One new item is an injection called Relistor. It's specifically made for narcotic-induced colon paralysis. He also takes Polyethylene Glycol every day. It doesn't help much but I guess it does keep him from exploding. If not, the headlines might read "This just in... Kansas man says he was minding his own bizniss when the s**t hit the fan!"

The tremors are worse and he jerks a lot during the night. It's difficult to get really good sleep when I'm waiting for the bed to jerk. Some nights I sleep very soundly (or so he says) but other nights, I know I'm just "waiting" for the next jerk. It's so much fun.

He says his hands are worse than they've ever been. It's discouraging for him, and for me. I don't want to "not" listen to him but I hear him talk about how badly he feels so often that I think I'm numb to it. I think that I just can't take any more. I'm already doing as much for him that I think I can do and to think that his hands might be the next thing to really "go" means I'd have to take over even more. I just don't know that I'm up to it. I lay out his pills every day now because his hands shake so badly that it's really too hard for him to do it. He doesn't do his insulin shots very often, either. When he does, he ends up making himself bleed and then there's just a mess on his shirts.

He can't put his brace on, so I do that and then, once it's on, I have a hard time getting his foot into the shoe. My thumbs hurt so badly some mornings that it's a real struggle to get his shoe on. I have figured out how far I have to unlace the right shoe and if I can get my forefinger in the "loop" at the back of the shoe, I can do it with one or two tries. The left shoe is difficult because the prosthesis ends at the same point where the laces start and many days his foot just pops right out of the shoe. He doesn't have much foot to put into the left shoe and the placement of the tongue/laces makes it difficult for him to keep it on once I get it laced up.

Ron can still only walk about 10-20 feet at any one time before he has to sit. The "new" hole in his right foot is slowly healing and (thank God!) it never got to the same degree as the last blister got. I honestly don't think I could manage another $50,000 bill. I still don't have the last bill from the wound vac paid (I still owe nearly $5,000). Ron's using the wheelchair when we go anywhere that I can't drop him off at the door and use their wheelchairs. He can take himself to our family doctor to have his blood drawn but it's difficult for him. I almost really need to do that, too. It's just a matter of the financial aspect of it. I've not used as many FMLA hours this year, but I also was not approved for as many. I can have up to three instances each month, whereas last year I had up to three instances per week.

Life, as usual, has its ups and downs. Life is definitely better than the alternative but he has mentioned more than once that he doesn't know how long he can live like this especially if he continues to decline.

I keep saying God's not finished with him yet and that's why he's still here. It may be for my benefit, or it may be for his benefit. But, I'm sure that when it's time for him to leave this world that God will have a pain-free place for him in the next.


ellen abbott said...

I just wanted to thank you for visiting my blog, for your comments and for joining me on my journey.

Pat said...

Wow - powerful post. It has been said that many people forget to look at the person who is PUSHING the wheel chair. You sure have a LOT on your plate. Although Ron is going through a lot, YOU certainly do, too. PLUS going to school? Although that may seem like an "out" to you. You are WOMAN, hear you ROAR. I have new found respect for you, girl! You are one tough cookie and a wonderful person.

Pat said...

Hey - stop by my blog and pick up an award I have for you!