I didn't think I was too stressed out over it, but I guess I am. I've been keeping myself dosed up on Xanax so the little things don't bother me quite as much. They don't really bother me anyway, but when all the little things get added up, then I have to say that I get bothered.
Like today... I bought Ron a new laptop (his was crap - CRAP, I tell ya!) and he has such trouble seeing and feeling, that I decided I'd go ahead. Dell had a special - 12 months same as cash - and we got a discount through work. So, I ordered him a laptop. It came yesterday and today I was trying to copy files from Old Laptop to New Laptop. I am also copying files from Isaiah's laptop (which is worse than Ron's - it's about 8 years old) because I'm going to give Old Laptop to Isaiah and give his away to someone else who doesn't currently have one - and she'll be thrilled to get it as she just wants to use it for recipes and stuff like that (Jamie, if you're reading this - you did not read about the laptop). Isaiah's was my first laptop that Shaun bought for me in either 2002 or 2003. It's not terribly fast but it's OK for surfing the web, for some little games (I installed a few games for Jamie's little girl), and for email. It's not great for memory-hogging stuff.
So, I have four laptops going (you'd think it was an Internet cafe here) as I'm copying, deleting, transferring, etc. and Ron decides he's going to clean out the table by his chair and the table the television sits on. Trouble is, he can take the stuff out, but he can't put anything back. And, then he's stuck because there's stuff on the floor and he can't drive around it. That means that I have to stop what I'm doing to go finish what he started. It would be different if this was a one-time event, but this is his method of operation... He'll start something that he cannot finish - or that he needs help with - while I'm right in the middle of something. And he expects, needs, wants me to stop what I'm doing to take care of what he's doing. Quite frankly - it irritates the hell out of me every time. Today - major irritation because I'm already doing something for HIM.
I took a Xanax. It was either that or throttle him.
Back to the EKG and stuff. I called my cardiologist's office just like I'd been told to do. He was out of the office yesterday morning and they're closed on Friday afternoon. I called my family doctor back and asked more specifically what "abnormal" meant and what I needed to do. I was planning on cleaning my garage today with my kids. But, I said my grandfather dropped dead at age 55 - heart attack; no real symptoms. My dad had his first heart attack at age 54; no real symptoms (some, but not tons). I said I'd already had some chest pains (mild - could have been stress or anxiety; they are very similar in "feeling") so what should I do. She said my S and T waves were abnormal and stayed abnormal throughout the EKGs and when the thallium put my heart under stress, it did not recover like it should have. She said that the goal in the heart cath would be to fix any problem that may be discovered. If it's a simple heart cath, even with stent placement, then the hospital recovery time was only four hours and they send you home for bedrest for the remainder of the day.
She said they would call on Monday and get an appointment set up for me. Until then, relax. No heavy housework. No cleaning the garage. No stress.
Has she met me before? Does she not know how my life goes? Ron has to go to the diabetic eye doctor. He has to go to the "butt doctor" (he gets a colonoscopy every six months and he's overdue). He goes to the "fake leg" guy every week. He's got to go see her every month to have his pain patches and pain pills refilled. He's got prostate problems (TMI?). First, he can't go - then he can't quit going. Keith had to have an MRI on his left knee (from the car wreck; Mr. Long Legs hit his knee on the dash when he got rear ended). He may have to have posterior cruciate ligament surgery.
If I died, Ron would not know who to call to file a life insurance claim, he does not know what bills come out of the account automatically every month and which ones I have reminders set up to remind me to physically pay them. He doesn't even know the login information for the bank. He doesn't know we have accounts at three different banks (I know - silly, but at the time they were each set up for a specific reason and just haven't combined them) or what the login information for the others are. I'm not even sure he knows which two other banks we have accounts at.
We have serious role reversals here.
No stress... No problem. We don't have problems here. We have situations... (learned that in Jamaica).
Houston... WE HAVE A SITUATION (or ten).
Seriously - I am doing fine with all things considered. Thanks for all the well-wishes and the prayers. I appreciate them. I talked to my step-daughter last night and she said that she could probably pick me up from the hospital the day of the test and take me home. Amy said to just let her know what day and she'd make arrangements, too.